Friday, August 14, 2009
I sure do. Just because I 'Tap' on all my issues and emotions doesn't mean I don't still have new ones that just come up as a result of living life. Working jobs. Having responsibilities. Being parents. Every day challenges and situational upsets.
What to do. Well, the best pro-active way would be prevention and maintence by Tapping regularly and good self-care. Strengthening your strengths and following some type of recovery program are good ways also.
Tapping every day or week or at least every time you get upset. Work a recovery slogan or principle or follow one positive suggestion.
Secondly, don't go it alone. It's hard enough when things are going good to not have someone who cares to talk to. There are support groups and phone-lines and chat groups all over the place to talk to others who share your stressor or are there for when people are in acute stress or crisis. Cultivate your friendships, keep them growing, be open to meeting new friends. Call a counselor if you need more.
But if you're not up on your daily maintence and suddenly you're blind-sided by an event that gets you all charged up. Well, then it's time for sure to do some serious Tapping.
Pop Quiz: What's the First thing you always do with Tapping?
Answer: Rate the Subjective Units of Distress (SUDs) on a scale of 1 to 10.
This is a very important thing to do for people who have Tapped several times before but haven't tapped in awhile and they want to do that "Tapping" thing again and are so focused on Tapping on the right points, they sometimes forget to give it a number to begin with.
This is actually Part of the process, not just the before and after proof that we all need to see it's working. The act of coming up with the number is 'tuning into' the problem. When you tune into a problem, you feel it. While feeling it you are tuning into your body or mind or intuition and rating how bad it feels to you. You tune into yourself and see how you subjectively rate your feeling.
This sets up the issue to be treated on. Then you are ready for the "Set-up Statement" and that is the "even though..." sentence.
OK, SO we have our Stressor and we've given it a number. Now what? We fill in the Set-Up Statement with our problem or issue or feeling. In this case, stress.
Say, "Even though I'm all stressed out, I love and accept myself"' three times.
You say that 3 times while Tapping rapidly and firmly on the side of your hand. The Karate Chop point.
Then begin a full round of EFT. (EFT's Basic Recipe is Tapping from the Eyebrow (EB) to the Little Finger (LF), and then do the Gamut Procedure with the eye rolls, and then do another full round of Tapping from EB to LF.)
Each time you Tap on a spot you repeat your Reminder Phrase, "Stressed".
Tap Tap Tap. Go to next point, say "stress, stress stress" and tap, tap tap.
When you get to the Gamut you just rub the triple warmer spot on the back of the hand, and do the eye rolls.
And then repeat the Tapping procedure from EB to LF and then off the Top of your Head or Crown Point as the last and final Tap when you're releasing it upward.
(I should have it all spelled out in a previous blog as far as the whole EFT procedure.)
Once you do a full round of EFT on the general category of Stress, you then procede to do EFT Short-cut rounds on any other thought that pops up.
Now that you've got your attention on stress and what's stressing you, you are focusing your attention on addressing the stress with the intention of treating it. The Tapping Round is like a mini treatment. Instead of reaching for a pill or food, you could Tap on it.
Just the act of acknowledging the various stressors and then tapping the intensity and charge out of the emotion you feel, helps other thoughts come up that were buried underneath them.
Some of these are root causes or sources of other stressors, or things this stressor reminds you of. These are literally called "aspects" of the main problem.
So you keep Tapping the short-cut round (EB - Under Arm (UA), while you say whatever comes to mind until a. you can't think of anything else that stresses you out or b. you are smiling or c. you begin mentally sorting it out on your own now that the negative charge is gone or diminished. Once the stress response calms down, the brain naturally starts to re-process and creatively sees the larger picture or the steps to change it for the better or being reminded of other important things, etc. so that you're mind is no longer obsessed with the stress of the day.
You just keep Tapping until you rate the SUDs number again and it gets down to a 2 or a less.
Even though I'm stressed about money, I love and accept myself.
Even though I'm stressed over my marriage, I love and accept myself.
Play with the ending more.
Even though I'm stressed over my kids, I love and accept myself - and them and so do they.
Even though I'm stressed over my car accident, I deeply and completley love and accept myself.
Even though I'm stressed over my job, I love, accept, approve of and forgive myself.
Even though I'm stressed over the fight I had with my spouse, I'm doing the best I can.
Even though I'm stressed about my boss, I'm learning valuable lessons.
Even though I'm stressed that I have to change, I love and accept change.
Even though I'm stressed over making an important decisions, I let it go and am open to the outcome.
Even though I don't know what to do, I set my intention and stay open for an opportunity.
So you're saying the above sentences while Tapping Short-cut Rounds. After awhile you might notice youreslf taking a deep healing breath, that is a good sign of energy being moved and let go or released.
Once you're in a place where you're more relaxed or smiling and feeling better you can apply the Choices Method to your various stressors.
Begin Tapping a Full EFT Basic Recipe Round on your new choice sentence:
"I now choose balance and harmoney between us"
"I now choose to understand his side of it"
"I now choose to forgive"
"I now choose to look for creative solutions"
"I now choose to ask open-ended questions"
And say you get to a choice you wish you had or that you want but seems scary, like, "I now choose to confront somebody" and fear comes up just thinking about it. Guess what? You just Tap a whole new Round on that fear.
"Even though I'm scared of confronting, so and so, I love and accept myself.
"Even though when I'm around so and so, I'm unsure of myself, I love and accept myself.
And so forth. The main idea is just to do it. Do it on the spot. But also do it in other ways. One other way would be to sit down and write a list of all your stressors today or about a situation. And just keep writing out a long list until you can't think of anything else. Then you start at number 1 and rate it's SUDs number. Set-up the Statement and begin the Full Round of EFT.
Then go on the number 2, rate it and set it up in the sentence and do a short-cut round on it. Then go on to number 3, rate it and do a short-cut and so on until each one goes down in number as you go down the list you'll see that many of them sort of fall off the list or are not that stressful by the time you get to them.
To Your Recovery
I'm a good enough mom.
I don't have to be perfect or over achieve or people please or the other recovery related issues that are involved.