It's not easy being a wounded healer.
There is always the struggle to stay balanced between so many things...
Between your own wellness and supporting others to be well.
Between personal life and business life.
Between your healing self and your social self.
And much more.
I think its especially hard for those wounded healers who feel they can't help others until they get over all their own issues, or have all the answers.
Its hard when rationally you know a lot of information that can help people, but the inner critic is saying you're not good enough.
I'm not really a goodie-two-shoes type, I don't find it easy to jump into "positive thinking". I find that's not practical when trying to survive life, nor is is realistic or even 'normal' to be good and perfect all the time - as if.
But I did learn - just from getting older and learning - how to live from survival to THURVIVAL.
What I mean by that is I've had many Thriving Times, but I've also had many, many pure Survival Times. I learned to weave thriving moments into those surviving times.
Believe me, I'm a reluctant expert on codependency. I love helping people with Tapping on Codependency, but at the same time I'm not a natural show-off, I'm an introvert by nature, so its been hard to get the word out. But let me share with you some Thurviving examples from my own life...
- When I was in an abusive relationship and later leaving it, having to move and go through the legal system and just trying to recover from it - I had post-traumatic stress for awhile.
One of the things I did was sign up to a self-defense class. It was very healing and empowering to do my practice exercises.
I was depressed, having nightmares, anxiety started to pop up in my life, I felt alone and ashamed...but I was also feeling strong and brave and empowered when I did exercise, walking or dance. And in those moments I was thriving despite the survival tasks I was trapped in.
- When I was depressed over being estranged from family on certain holidays, I created my own holiday rituals and did things with new friends. This was to help me survive emotionally.
After many years of this I went through another phase where I didn't want to feel obligated to holidays and all the "shoulds" they contain. I rebelled. This helped me to thrive emotionally because I empowered myself to be "self-directed" and not family-directed or society-directed. I was thurving when society didn't approve, but I gave myself permission to be free to make my own decisions.
For those of us who grow up Codependent and don't know anything else, it can take a lifetime to develop the ability to have a new viewpoint.
But you can thrive right in the middle of feeling completely screwed up!
When issues come up - you can TAP on them.
Rather than remain stuck in them.
Tapping helped me thrive more during survival times. Its my tool of choice on my Thurvival Journey
See you on the next post.
~ Jeanette ~
J.P.Bailey, MA, EFT-CC
Emotional Freedom Coach
Master's in Psychology
Certified Energy Practioner
Mental Health Clinician
Recovery Case Manager